Hello! Welcome to my journey through recovery! I chose to write a blog showing others that life is possible after years of struggling to stay sober.
My journey started at age 14 when I started smoking pot after school with neighborhood kids. Then I started skipping school and sniffing pills. Oh how I wish I knew what I was getting into! Fast forward to age 19, I was a complete train Wreck and I wasn’t even close to rock bottom. I started using heroin in my mom’s basement with the “love of my life”. Some days I really cannot comprehend what went through my mind when I thought oh just one shot, just one bag, just one slip up won’t hurt. I would go through periods of sobriety (usually when I was single) and then I would be right back in the saddle over night. Knowing my family was heartbroken, my bank account overdrawn, and self respect was gone was not enough to keep me straight. Then at age 25 strung out, living in a shitty motel “dating” men three times my age for my next fix I had it. I owed drug dealers money, my small frail body covered in bruises and I had no life left in me. I used my last 20$ my mom had sent me on Venmo to take a lift to a local detox. I sat in the waiting room so sick and worn out. I was nodding out in the chair and the receptionist said “I am sorry but we can’t take you.” Tears in my eyes I gave up. I decided the fight is over. I went in the bathroom and shot up three philly bags in hopes of dying. I awake to a paramedic narcaning me. Holy shit I was dead and looking back I realized how selfish I was. I was actually angry that I had been saved. The paramedic said “girlie you need help.” Then the dropped me off at a local “holding spot” for addicts needing detox. I was broke and sick so I stayed. The next morning I was woken up by a nure who had all my belongings ( a small bag of clothes, my phone, and a note book). She walked me out to a van and said “ You will only change if your ready.” Two hours later I arrived at connections Harrington, DE. My only thought was “where the fuck am I? If I leave here, I’m screwed!” I decided at that moment I needed to grow up. I utilized every opportunity presented to me and now I am employed, legal, and living!
My post will cover the areas in which I needed help the most in my first year of recovery and you may need help with too! If you have any questions feel free to email me any time.